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Water Corpse Look, Joyfully Excited Nipples, Hairdressing cape

With this white satin dinner jacket by John Galliano for Dior, worn as a matter of course by a drama queen in her category with an extravagantly oversized Gatsby hat

Sybilla Drew - Tue, 12 Mar 2024 15:09:13 +0000 1926 Views
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Wreathed in seaweed - Melanie Griffith

This gown by Versace Couture will be remembered forever from the 2005 Oscars. But not because Melanie Griffith hobbled down the red carpet with her leg in plaster and on crutches. The dress, whose color is aptly described as Sea Foam Green, makes the actress' complexion look like that of a corpse that has just been pulled out of the stinking sea foam surrounded by seaweed. Not even the fringed, low back décolleté, which you can't see here, helped. But what would Griffith say? "That's a role, too." The dress later ended up on the online flea market 1stdibs.com and went for a whopping 9500 euros. An embarrassment given its glamorous origins.

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Skirt pulled under the armpits - Billie Eilish

This would have been the perfect evening gown for "When the Gondolas Mourn", but on Billie Eilish this drab explosion of ruffled silk taffeta from Gucci looks more like she forgot her top and simply pulled the skirt with train up under her armpits. In contrast, her Chanel sleeping bag from two years ago wasn't so bad in hindsight, but a real highlight. Baggy style just can't be adapted to everything. In her 2022 appearance, the fashionable approach becomes more of a baroque bin bag. Incidentally, she won for the best original song with the Bond anthem "No Time To Die". She sent a selfie of herself sitting on the toilet to a fashion critic on TikTok, who disparaged her with the words "I've had enough of her shit", with the comment: "Not me by a long shot."

Very transparent - Gwyneth Paltrow

The fascination of young people in particular with looking old and wrinkly often culminates in a subculture known as goth. A prime example of this often unflattering style was demonstrated by Gwyneth Paltrow at the 2002 Oscars. She wore an outfit that looked more like moth-eaten flea market finds from a "Dracula" film to go with her moody dark eyes and scary braided hairstyle. She received a lot of flak for her dress with a see-through vest top and a gathered taffeta skirt by Alexander McQueen. The net-like tulle top was so see-through that her nipples were visible. A no-go in prudish America in 2002. Her only mistake, she said later, was not wearing a bra at the time. Sounds like an improvement we would have liked to have seen.

Dressed up as her own butler - Diane Keaton

There really are thousands of copies of this Chaplin outfit hanging in every costume shop. You can go to a little more trouble for an Oscar. And yet everything was going well for Diane Keaton in 2004: an Oscar nomination for "What the Heart Desires" and a Golden Globe award for Best Actress for the same role. The trick with the Woody Allen hat (yawn) has become her trademark and she is obviously reluctant to let go of it. But hats at evening galas are simply bad style (see Céline Dion). Or has anyone ever seen the Queen in an evening dress with a hat? And would she voluntarily turn up to a party dressed as her own butler? Keaton must have been glad that she wasn't simply handed the coats of the other guests without a word that evening.

Success turns heads - Céline Dion

She is not a star of soft tones, and Céline Dion also likes to turn up the heat when it comes to fashion. This was also the case at the 1999 Oscars with this white satin dinner jacket by John Galliano for Dior, worn as a matter of course by a drama queen in her category with an extravagantly oversized Gatsby hat. She was invited as the previous year's winner, having scooped the golden uncle for the "Titanic" hit "My Heart Will Go On". So much success can make your head spin. Malicious tongues wanted to have recognized in her the returning Meryl Streep from "Death Stands Her Ground", who also sometimes had to screw her head back to the front. With a hole in her stomach, the look would have been a hit.

Mating headdress - Cher

Cher allegedly presented this disturbing "Revenge Dress" in 1986 as revenge for not being nominated for her role in "The Mask" the year before. Scandalous Oscar outfits were her trademark in the 70s and 80s, but does that mean you have to look like a startled - and incidentally plucked - Dominatrix forest bustard with a mating headdress? The fact that she violated all the dress codes of the event in this evil mother-in-law outfit with so much admittedly impressive midriff must have given her a hell of a laugh. She and the designer of this belly dance robe, Bob Mackie, have had a fruitful fashion friendship since the 60s. They are said to still work together today.

Stubborn refusal - Uma Thurman

This pirate rag from Christian Lacroix Couture on Uma Thurman looks more like an "escape from the Caribbean". Was she going to storm the Oscars with it in 2004, like La Marianne once stormed the Bastille? Vive la révolution? Revolutionary fashion statements are known to be mercilessly punished at the Oscars. Allegedly, she had even deliberately chosen the dress, as she later claimed, in order to climb to the top of the worst-dressed lists. If this had been the premiere of "Pirates of the Caribbean", which was nominated in the same year and in which she, unfortunately, does not appear, Uma Thurman would have been celebrated for this tulle orgy. As it is, it seems more like the stubborn refusal of a star who bravely appears at the Oscars, even though Thurman or her then-current film "Kill Bill 1" were not nominated in a single category.

Hairdressing cape with skin flaps - Barbra Streisand

The 1992 Oscars must have been a bitter disappointment for Barbra Streisand. Her film, "Lord of the Tides", in which she directed and played the female lead, was nominated in seven categories but then came away empty-handed. There was no chance against "The Silence of the Lambs" this year. Streisand must have had a hunch. Why else would she have chosen this flesh-colored hairdressing cape as her dress, which hangs down on her like flaccid flaps of skin? The fashion history background that followed didn't help either: the designers Charles and Patricia Lester were inspired by the pleating technique of the genius of the century, Mariano Fortuny. Unfortunately, Lester makes us think of Hannibal Lecter - and what he would have made from the skin flaps.

Washing glasses with Gaga - Lady Gaga

From giving birth to calves at her Malibu Beach Ranch straight to the Oscars? Lady Gaga likes it more "raw," as we remember from her meat shred dress to the 2010 MTV Awards. At the Oscars, like here in 2015, where she only made one appearance with "The Sound Of Music", she is usually more well-behaved, as in this dress by Azzedine Alaïa, which is embroidered with tonnes of crystal beads but is quite unspectacular. Only the slightly perverse-looking red gloves betray a bloodthirsty spleen. With them, the singer becomes the most animated meme of the event. If you imagine her doing the washing up with a floral apron in addition to the rubber gloves, which are actually made of leather, you'll be transported to an episode of "Desperate Housewives". This look is sure to make you particularly furious when scrubbing the floor.

Opaque but cheeky - Anne Hathaway

The 2013 Oscars could have been the perfect Audrey Hepburn moment for Anne Hathaway. Everything about her was "iconic": the short bob haircut, the super-simple pink satin dress by Prada and the Oscar for her interpretation of Fantine from the film version of "Les Misérables". If it hadn't been for the somewhat cheeky upturned bust darts on the dress, which became the talking point of the event. But there was nothing to see! But that's how unfair the double standards are in this business. Heidi Klum can philosophize for hours on talk shows about her breasts called Hans and Franz, but with a perfect innocence like Anne Hathaway, the mere appearance of a joyfully excited nipple under the opaque dress is enough to cause waves of indignation.



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